News from the Room
Pregnancy After Loss: A Journey of Grief and Hope
When we fell pregnant again after losing Billie, I knew the experience would be completely different. I expected it to be hard, but I wasn’t fully prepared for how complex it would be, especially for my wife. Pregnancy after loss is a different kind of journey. It’s filled with cautious hope, relentless anxiety, and the constant tension between wanting to believe it will all be okay and fearing it won’t.
As the dad, my instinct was to protect and support, to take on as much as I could. But in a subsequent pregnancy, no matter how much you try to shoulder the load, the heaviest weight, the anxiety, the stress, the exhaustion falls on the mother. She’s the one who feels every movement (or the absence of it), who carries not just the physical burden but majority of the emotional one as well. The weight of grief and hope exists in every kick, every scan, every appointment.
What I learned quickly was that extra care matters more than anything in a subsequent pregnancy. Care from medical professionals who get it and won’t brush off your concerns. Care in setting boundaries around who you let into your life during that time. And care in making sure my wife felt supported and heard at every step.
For me, that meant showing up in every way I could, being at every appointment, advocating for our baby, and being there during the never-ending morning sickness. It also meant managing my own grief and anxiety so I could keep it together when things felt overwhelming. That’s not always easy, especially when your own fears are just below the surface.
But I realised the most important thing I could do wasn’t to “fix” or “reassure.” It was to just be as present as possible, and supportive as possible.
Pregnancy after loss is a hard road, and the strength it takes to walk it, especially for the mother is immense. If there’s one takeaway I’d encourage any dad or partner to remember. It’s that sometimes, extra care is just about being there. It’s about knowing we can’t take the weight from their shoulders, but we can stand beside them and make sure they know they aren’t alone.
The 411
This Week at Room Eleven
Scooters, World Records & $100,000!
Image from my Scoot Ireland Journey in 2018 - Riding from Malin to Mizen Head.
This week marks a huge milestone for Room Eleven, and it’s something very close to my heart. I’m excited to officially announce my next major challenge: I’ll be attempting the Guinness World Record for the greatest distance travelled on a kick scooter in 24 hours, aiming to beat the current 20 year old record of 269.1 km.
This challenge is about more than just breaking a record though. It’s about raising $100,000 for pregnancy after loss care at the Royal Women’s Hospital in Melbourne. The funds raised will support the establishment and growth of a specialised clinic offering crucial care and support to families who have experienced pregnancy loss and require additional care during subsequent pregnancies.
This record attempt is a continuation of our mission, creating a legacy for Billie whilst supporting families who have lost. By combining this endurance challenge with a cause that’s meaningful to so many, we can make a real difference in the lives of other families who are walking a similar, difficult path.
Over the next few months, I’ll be sharing more about the preparation for this challenge and how you can be involved. Whether it’s through spreading the word, supporting the fundraiser, or simply following along, your support means everything as we work towards our goal of raising $100,000 for pregnancy after loss care.
If you know any organisations that align with this mission and might be interested in sponsoring the event, please send them my way.
To make this challenge a success, I’ll need all the support I can get!
Thank you for being part of this journey.
Weekly Musings
What I’m Watching: Paradise
My sister recommended this show to me. It’s recently released and follows a US Secret Service agent assigned to protect the president. He’s trying to solve a murder, but there’s more going on, no spoilers. It’s intriguing, well-acted, and the cast is top-tier.
That said, it’s one of those shows with flashbacks to build character depth and a plot that unravels slowly. You’ve got to give it your full attention to keep up, and honestly, I just don’t have the mental bandwidth for that right now.
So, after one enjoyable episode, I went back to watching Everybody Loves Raymond for the 100th time, perfect for zoning out.
Quote I’m Pondering: “Whatever you’re not changing, you’re choosing”
Image from Mount Macedon clifftops
This quote has been echoing in my mind lately, especially as I’ve started shifting my focus. For a long time, I’ve balanced my passion projects with a full-time job, a job that served a purpose but wasn’t my purpose. It gave me security, but it didn’t light a fire in me.
Now, I’m stepping fully into Room Eleven, a project that encompasses everything I care about. It’s not just work; it’s my heart, my values, and my mission all rolled into one. And as I reflect on this quote, I realise that staying where I was would have been a choice. By not changing, I’d be choosing to let my dreams and this mission sit on the sidelines.
That’s the tough thing about change, it feels risky, uncomfortable, even scary at times. But what’s scarier is staying still when everything in you is telling you to move forward.
This challenge, this record attempt, this whole new chapter, it’s me choosing to lean into what matters most.
What I’m Listening To: Various Event fundraising and sponsorship podcasts.
This $100,000 fundraising challenge comes with its own operating costs, costs I’ll need to cover through sponsorships so I can focus on what matters most: raising funds, planning the event, and building key partnerships. I’m diving deep into event planning and sponsorship strategies, learning how to approach organisations the right way and set this challenge up for success from day one.
Personal Development: The Speakers Institute
This year, I’m aiming to pursue more speaking opportunities to promote and fundraise for the scooter challenge. In a couple of weeks, there’s a free storytelling workshop hosted by The Speakers Institute, and I’m hoping to attend. It’s a great chance to refine and develop my talk on grief, growth, and resilience.
I’ve crafted three versions of this talk, tailored for corporates, hospitals, and schools, and I’m always looking for ways to make it more impactful for each audience.
Pregnancy after loss is a tough road, grief and hope constantly pull you in opposite directions. After losing Billie, being pregnant again was way harder than I expected, especially for my wife. Every appointment, every scan, every kick carried so much weight. I quickly realised my role wasn’t to fix or reassure, it was just to show up, be present, and make sure she knew she wasn’t walking that road alone.
That’s why this challenge matters. It’s a chance to honour Billie, raise awareness, and push for better care for families like ours. Big goals take big efforts, but with your support, whether it’s spreading the word, donating, or just following the journey and sending positive vibes, we can make a real difference. Let’s do something meaningful together.
Take care, and I’ll see you next week.
Rob
Giving Back
Donate a Still Billie Box
Our care packages for families who’ve lost their baby, named after our baby daughter Billie. Offering comfort during what should be a joyful season. Your donation can make a real difference in allowing us to provide free Still Billie Boxes to hospitals across Australia.
Room Eleven is a social enterprise business and does not qualify for DGR status.